A Heartbroken Soul’s Elegy

You have incinerated my flickering hopes,

Slaughtered my sentient emotions,

Bombarded my imperishable love,

Enshrouded my pervading trust,

Shredded asunder my poor miserable heart.

You have made me pistanthrophobic,

Dispassionate in love,

Stultified me in all pursuits,

Plundered my forlorn dreams,

Drowned me into an imperturbable tranquility.

You have strewn the promenade with briars,

Gifted me wrangles and contretemps,

Encapsulated quandaries and maddened me into a psychopath,

Tickled me with whetted venomous fangs,

Transformed me into an insipid,unamenable moron.

You have jettisoned my goodness into acrimony,

Volatalized my intrinsic affection,

Snatched away all the potpourri of happiness,melancholia,and excruciating pain,

Pushed me into a saturnine, infernal realm,

And cascaded down the elixir of heaven to the necropolis.

Your verisimilitude of eternity metamorphosed into ephemerality,

Your liaison slackened into alienation,

Your unkept promises simmer like a roar of distant thunder,

Your abeyant touches afflict my senses with maladies,

And your evanescent visage arouses horripilation at midnight.

On Baba’s request

This is because Baba had asked me to pen down a poem for him…….

In the ambiguity between what to write and how to write,

Ruminating whether to write for you or about you,

Myriad thoughts gushing in my mind,

Colliding and resulting in concussion,

Trying hard to invoke my imagination,

And impress the unsolicited call of my creativity.

I still don’t know why I am doing this,I don’t feel like doing

Your rough coarse hands that have caught hold of my soft tiny fingers,

While I was delved in the joy of jumping-

From a toddler to a jubilant kid learning to totter.

I love the warmth of your long,husky arms

Serving me a refuge,a latibule,and a hideout to escape Ma’s admonitions

I wish you had lifted me up very often like you did in the childhood days-

Such sweet fleeting days have gone

Leaving me only with reminescences

The good old innocent days vanished

Replacing it with complications, intricacies and asymmetries.

Our propinquity has a cause-effect paradigm-

You see me blooming gracefully each day,

I too have seen your mutation from a tricenarian to a quinquagenarian,

I notice you flushing with confidence and valour,

Flourishing with prosperity and seulements,

Sleeky black beards and moustache fainting into grey.

I hate when you show your over-indulgence in me

The same me feels insecure when you deliberately perform your ignorance.

Last night you rebuked me for not having the unappetizing vegetable curry

Seems you have grown strict with your age.

I too turn splenetic at times.

You endure all my tantrums and nuisances.

You have yet not revealed your birth date to me and Ma,

Always trying to prevaricate and posing your oblivescence

Don’t you understand how inglorious it is for a daughter not aware of her father’s birthday?

Your infectious smile cherishes me,

Your powerful baritone gives me the urge to fight and counter-attack.

And I know this puckish daughter of yours is a source of trouble-

I promise to give you troubles, tensions,and worries,

In return for your unconditional love and sempiternal affection.

I know well that these rich and priceless gifts won’t fail to acknowledge you,

As I see you basking in the glory of fatherhood,

And you will continue to preserve all my incompetencies.

I’m not sure whether this piece of writing can be connoted as a poem. I know that only a father like you will read this insufficient expression of gratitude-a total rubble,you will reread this trash again and again and keep it with you as long as you breathe.

Those not in the limelight

Pause for a moment. As silence and darkness engulf your rustling sepulchral mind,be static and break the serenity with a big round of applause. Obviously this is for yourself. I have tried out writing some lines to eulogize the sincere efforts and the woe of those whose voices are unheard in this crisis. Well,if you still couldn’t make out about whom I am alluding to,it’s we – the students and the teachers,the invisible Corona warriors.

With the outbreak of the novel COVID-19 pandemic and the death toll rising in an unprecedented scale,the world has come to a grinding halt. The lethal disease resulting in the tragic loss of precious human lives is disheartening. The uncertainty of recuperation has left the world in a great jeopardy. I tried reflecting some grievances overpowering me,you and umpteen students alike. Our lament is universal and we are connected with each other by the common thread of pain. Can we really hold someone responsible for the present scenario?Who is culpable – time or destiny?Who should be actually anathematized?Do you have any answer?No. We are just gobsmacked.

The sudden plunge to virtual classrooms has left us in a flabbergasted state. Classes have turned into nightmares. Is this life?No physical interaction, no moving around freely and what not – simply seems horrendous. Moving on to online classes was quite aghasting to the students as well as to the teachers and professors. There are clamorous voices – ‘Please mute the microphones’ instead of ‘students please keep quiet.’

The metamorphosis still seems like a science fiction to many of us where we are living in a technical cosmos – brain mechanical but mind emotional.But where ink and paper works,technology fails to operate. The pestilence is disastrous to our health but these online classes have an apocalyptic effect on our mind. Our wrath is plausible,but acceptance is the way of life. We are just fatigued of condolences,solicitude, and alternatives. We crave for empathy,not sympathy. The equilibrium between the subliminal and the monochromatic thoughts is dismantled. Our peace of mind is quite uneasy. Our mental health is faltering and we are literally deranged.

The teachers and professors are also in a similar distress but they are not neglecting their duties even in the midst of such tough times. Apart from teaching and keeping us preoccupied with various assignments and activities during the quarantine,they have become our psychological companions and stimulants. They do not stop encouraging and guiding us in every possible way.

A three-year old kid looking forward to join school might be thinking if he/she had just entered the portals of formal education. On the other hand,those applying for various jobs might be thinking if they had only settled. All of us are bilious of this life. We can’t help asking our teachers when shall we go back to our celestial abode. They too reciprocate their sorrow over our agony. They express grief over the fact that how difficult it is to teach one’s own face as our videos are turned off. They desperately miss our blithe vibrant countenances.

If we ever return to our domicile,there would be new decorum concerning the health issues. We won’t sit beside our friends,we won’t share books and tiffins,our hands and faces covered with gloves and masks respectively. The libraries eagerly await our arrival. Shall we never get back to the rooms filled with the faint,musty smell of books?A masked life in this eremozoic era,nice joke. It feels like we are residing in Erebus.

As many lives are likely to face the inevitable,there would be some to narrate the devastating history ravaging this mundane,tenebrous,vapid world in the generations to come – marking the beginning of a new age,a new civilization perhaps. We are swaying on tenterhooks,where collywobbles build up nests everyday. There are yells ‘ The storm shall pass.’ We know that storms are not eternal just like our poor immortal bodies. But is there anyone to save us from this wreckage,turbulence,tumult and the topsy-turvy sitch?Fear of death,claustrophobia and boredom is exacerbating our traumatised senses. Thus,our agitated souls adding to our bewilderment and thereby making us feel despondent.

We are leading a life of obscurity where miracles too encounter tribulations.Instead of rekindling a false hope ‘ everything will be fine,’ let us think for a minute,think out of our optimistic notions and invigorate the hope of reality ‘ some things will be alright.’ So let’s wait. Waiting is the solution,patience the key and endurance the way.

SMILE. FIGHT. SURVIVE. HOPE BUT DO NOT EXPECT. HOPE BUT DO NOT EXPECT.